Posted on May 12, 2009 by tubesteak
FARRINGTON, MD - A popular hermit crab from the waters off Farrington has been charged with cutting off the penis of a 47-year-old man out for a morning swim on Sunday. Derek the Hermit Crab claims to have lost his temper after yet another episode of the same man urinating on his dwelling.
Witnesses at the beach say they saw Derek [...]
Filed under: comedy, events, pop culture, questions | Tagged: humor, funny, animals, marine life, bizarre, oddities, crabs, hermit crabs, beach, summer, losing limbs, handicap, odd news, gross, nature | No Comments »
Posted on May 4, 2009 by tubesteak
(Can you guess her muff style? Click here for the answer.)
The Community wanted to share a most decent website that we’ve been alerted to called Guess Her Muff. It’s an ingenious concept that presents a photo of a fully clothed broad and poses the question: What is her muff style?
Is it au naturel? Is there a [...]
Filed under: bored?, links, questions, romance, style | Tagged: beauty, breasts, diversity, muff, mystery, pubic hair, sex, websites, women | No Comments »
Posted on April 29, 2009 by tubesteak
Just in time to squash fears that everyone in the world is turning into decaying corpses, Decent Community has concocted an easy-to-prepare vaccine to combat the dreaded swine flu. You’ll likely find all of the serum’s ingredients in your household, and if not there, at your local supermarket. Once again, The Community has saved civilization from total [...]
Filed under: events, grizzle, politics, questions | Tagged: swine flu, vaccine, tuna casserole, positive attitude, swine flu vaccine, buffalo wings, corpse, serum, recipes | 2 Comments »
Posted on April 28, 2009 by tubesteak
There’s few things that The Community respects more than a quality t-shirt. Granted, the best tees are the ones you’ve worn and nurtured over the years — the ones your lady is begging you to throw away. You can occasionally find something decent at your local thrift store for a good price, but those places [...]
Filed under: links, pop culture, questions, style | Tagged: clothes, design, fashion, list, reproductions, retro, t-shirts, vintage, websites | No Comments »
Posted on April 24, 2009 by tubesteak
Due to unprecedented recent growth, Decent Community is seeking out a summer intern looking to get their feet wet in the promotion of decency throughout the greater community. This is a fabulous opportunity for college students who are really good looking, reek of headiness, are a little bit weird, and love to party.
The intern will learn [...]
Filed under: boston, events, questions | Tagged: beer, party, jobs, internship, errands, smokes, college | No Comments »
Posted on April 22, 2009 by tubesteak
Wanted to share this beautiful love story about a fat, ugly man named Gus and a supposed lesbian named Yvette. Both have fallen on some hard times and have had extreme difficulties getting laid!
Enter destiny (and smooth singer/guitarist/surfer/ladies man Jack Johnson). Out of options, Gus approaches the apparent lesbian in a department store [...]
Filed under: events, movies, online videos, questions, romance, style, tunes | Tagged: Music, food, love, Jams, pregnancy, Jack Johnson, department stores, hot dogs, videos, lesbians, child birth | 2 Comments »
Posted on April 15, 2009 by tubesteak
Never trust a dude wearing a visor unless his name is Freddy Couples. Why? Cause the dude is a douche who has no good reason for wearing such a sleazy accessory, other than imposing his self styled “sweetness” upon others who could really care less.
Problem is, the dude is never quite as snazzy as he thinks he is. His exaggerated enthusiasm, [...]
Filed under: not decent, pop culture, questions, style | Tagged: ego, enthusiasm, fashion, golf, hair, headwear, ignorance, trust, visors | No Comments »
Posted on April 14, 2009 by tubesteak
Contrary to popular belief, there have been numerous instances of acing a par-5. Since almost nobody - even with today’s supercharged equipment - can hit a 500-yard drive, the best place to look for par-5 aces are severe doglegs, or even a bit horseshoe-shaped. On such holes, a long-hitter can attempt to cut a corner, clear trees or [...]
Filed under: events, questions, sports | Tagged: condor, double albatross, golf, hole-in-one, impossible, miracle, par-5, triple eagle | No Comments »
Posted on April 10, 2009 by tubesteak
Hey Rook, you’re in the big leagues now — time for a new haircut, some new clothes and a little bit of professionalism. Seriously, clean your shit up — otherwise you’re just wasting our time. We work in a fast-paced environment here, and we don’t tolerate slow learners, good-for-nothin hacks, or two-bit jabronis. We know our stuff [...]
Filed under: boston, local, politics, pop culture, questions, ramblings, style | Tagged: amateur, boss, business, haircuts, job application, jobs, work | 1 Comment »
Posted on April 7, 2009 by tubesteak
One of the most despicable types of gatherings is the sausage fest — a party where chicks are scarce or even non-existent, leaving guys to get obliterated so as to drown in their misery. Make no mistake, the overabundance of wieners is a huge blow to the ego and a somber affirmation that you’ll be going skin-less [...]
Filed under: bronsons, events, not decent, pop culture, questions, romance, style | Tagged: dudes, girls, parties, sausage, sausage fest, sausage party | No Comments »
Posted on April 3, 2009 by tubesteak
You’re all beautiful and we mean that from the bottom of our hearts. We don’t simply mean good-looking (although all of you are). You’re just a swell, impressive crew. Quite the classy bunch, you guys. You’re sex and intelligence wrapped up in a ball. You’re arousing in every way. Truly.
It’s mind-blowing, really — how beautiful all of [...]
Filed under: questions, ramblings, romance, style | Tagged: appreciation, beauty, class, dance, dog catcher, dogs, honor, intelligence, nobility, party, people, sex | 2 Comments »
Posted on April 2, 2009 by tubesteak
Main Entry: F.U.P.A.
Pronunciation: \fü-pə\
Function: noun
Etymology: American, from obese hogs frequenting McD’s.
1 : Acronym for fat upper pussy area. Also may stand for fat upper pubic area or fat upper penile area. Area has become enlarged due the overindulgence of snacks and is usually accompanied by sour stench.
2 : Home of ants, hornets nests, and assorted [...]
Filed under: grizzle, not decent, pop culture, questions, romance, style | Tagged: blubber, bugs, definition, erotica, fat, food, fupa, hygiene, snacks, ugly, weight gain | No Comments »
Posted on April 1, 2009 by tubesteak
Holy shit! This kid is goddamn unbelievable! He’s a 13-year-old conservative wonderkid named is Jonathan Krohn, and he’s exactly the type of dude whose ass I used to kick in elementary school. I’d gladly drop the hammer on him now if I wasn’t more than twice his age.
This bastard isn’t loathsome [...]
Filed under: events, not decent, online videos, politics, pop culture, questions | Tagged: beat down, conservatism, conservative, GOP, idealogy, Jonathan Krohn, nerd, policy, principles, republicans, twerp | 4 Comments »
Posted on March 27, 2009 by tubesteak
Over the past few years, we’ve witnessed a steady trend of males unbuttoning their dress shirts in the name of style. At the Community, we were always under the impression that unbuttoning the top button (when not wearing a tie) was the way to go. But recent developments have caused us to question this school of thought.
We [...]
Filed under: events, pop culture, questions, style | Tagged: Brad Pitt, clothes, dress, fashion, George Clooney, John Stamos | 1 Comment »
Posted on March 26, 2009 by tubesteak
One of the purest, back-to-nature endeavors The Community advocates is humping beautiful virgin florists raw dog — preferably in their fragrant workshops of eroticism (aka the local flower shop). Indeed, the unblemished cooter is to humanity what a flower is to nature — life-giving, elegant and fragile.
Penetrating a florist’s pristine orchid raw dog is a conquest of unadultered decency because the [...]
Filed under: events, local, questions, romance, style | Tagged: erotica, florist, flowers, love, raw dog, sex, virginity, virgins | No Comments »
Posted on March 24, 2009 by tubesteak
Motives and actions can be ambiguous — and even more dubious when they don’t correlate with one another. An apparent con artist may be seeking life’s simple comforts — yet observers can easily be thrown off by what they witness on the surface.
With that preface, The Community presents the fifth rendering of [...]
Filed under: books, boston, bronsons, dc short jams, local, movies, online videos, questions, style | Tagged: rogue, deception, film, cinema, ski mask | 2 Comments »
Posted on March 18, 2009 by tubesteak
BOSTON, MA — In a joint statement released Wednesday afternoon, financial derelicts Bernard Madoff, R. Allen Stanford, and American International Group (AIG) condemned Decent Community for being the foremost purveyors of decency in America.
This curious alliance between three of our current recession’s figureheads formed to combat a growing sense of optimism and decency amidst widespread financial turmoil.
An [...]
Filed under: events, not decent, politics, pop culture, questions | Tagged: AIG, Allen Stanford, Bernard Madoff, finance, fraud, MLB, Money, New England Patriots, nfl, Ponzi, recession, Yankees | No Comments »
Posted on March 17, 2009 by tubesteak
Nothing freaks out The Community more than someone who cares way too much about cats. Cat lovers are usually lonely, older ladies with thick glasses, short hair, whose homes smell like urine. They’re grabbing onto whatever sense of companionship that’s available — even if it’s from a soul-less, sly, and stubborn feline.
Cat lovers will go berserk in defending [...]
Filed under: not decent, questions, romance, style | Tagged: animals, cat lovers, cats, love, pets, trust | No Comments »
Posted on March 16, 2009 by tubesteak
Dear Mr. Bluetooth Wearer,
It’s an unfortunate day for you, you smug bastard, because The Community is exposing you! That’s right you dickhead, we’re outing you to the world, and soon you’ll be finished! Nobody will have to watch you talking to yourself with those self-righteous spaceman ear devices — and we can all move on with [...]
Filed under: not decent, pop culture, questions, style | Tagged: Bluetooth, devices, exposed, open letter, phone, technology | 1 Comment »
Posted on March 12, 2009 by tubesteak
If you are looking for a mustachioed companion that will provide years of overwhelming ecstasy and even act as a watchdog in your motor home, acquiring a Schnauzer may be your answer. Here’s what your stank-ass should do after you’ve decided that a Schnauzer is the dog for you:
Find a reputable Schnauzer breeder. It’s said [...]
Filed under: events, questions | Tagged: booze, Buying a Dog, cigarettes, coitus, dog breeders, dogs, motor homes, puppies, Schnauzers | No Comments »
